Quotes from focus experts

Quotes from my focus experts

Virginia Buysse, PhD

“We conclude by noting that it is not sufficient to determine a practice is research-based.  Every practitioner must consider whether a practice is appropriate for a particular child or family within a specific local context.” (Buysse, et. al, 2012 p. 28)

http://www.azquotes.com/author/77138-Janet_Gonzalez_Mena, Retrieved September 21, 2015

 http://www.azquotes.com/author/53467-Magda_Gerber, retrieved September 21, 2015

Personal Childhood Blog

My dad: Walter Jones

My dad was one of those people in my life who led by example.  He modeled patience and true caring for others.  I never had to wonder or be afraid of his reactions if I had done something wrong.  Usually he would just ask me what I was going to do to make it right.  I felt so bad anytime I would disappoint him, it didn’t happen too often.  My dad made time for me and let me tag along on fishing, camping and hikes, even when I was the only girl going.  My dad had high expectations for me and always made sure I knew he had faith that I could accomplish anything I decided to try.  My dad always showed me unconditional love and shared his faith in Jesus Christ with me.  He taught me about being “real” with others to give honest feedback even when it was not pleasant.  He taught me about serving others and giving back to the community.  I still have my dad inside my head as I go through life being my self reflective partner asking myself the hard questions and remembering is faith in me to see things through.

My mom: Zona Jones

My mom had definite opinions and rules for just about everything.  She never deviated from her rules.  Fair always meant the same.  She had rules about chores, how many friends could stay over, how long we could spend taking a bath, how much I could pay for a pair of shoes, etc.  She was never super affectionate, but always gave me a sense of security and consistency.  Things had to be done just so, but when they were completed she would give us praise and let us know she appreciated the help.  My mom’s favorite slogan was “you don’t work you don’t eat”, not that we ever went hungry but it got the point across.  When I look back on it now, she had five kids, one modest family income, and a large household to run.  I think my mom taught me to work hard as a team player, show appreciation to others, and to treat others as you would want to be treated.

My big sister: Linda Conn

My oldest sister (12 years older) left for college when I was only five years old.  What I remember the most about her is she always found a way to make me feel like she truly enjoyed my company and cherished our moments together.  She would make my birthdays extra special by doing little things like putting pretty decorations on the cake.  She’d brush my hair before I went to bed, make clothes for my Barbie dolls,  and give me her old records that she did not need anymore.  I was very sad when she left for college. When she had her first daughter (I was only nine), I took on that role towards her daughter, nurtured and loved her.  I think my sister taught me about being a loving caring person and that children should be cherished and respected.  She continues to special things for me as an adult: she makes personal greeting cards and sends them “just because”; takes me to the theater;  and arranges for a sisters weekend.

Friend of the Family at Church: “Pinky” Waid

“Pinky” was an elder at our church, every Sunday he would greet me with, “Well if it isn’t the beautiful Brenda Jones”.  He was always very verbal with his emotions and affection.  Coming from an adult male, it made an impact on me.  He continued to greet me the same way, until about a year ago, when he passed away.  Growing up with a low self-esteem, his weekly affirmation gave me hope that there was something in me that was truly beautiful. 

My big brother: David Jones

My older brother was very protective of me.  He would protest if someone was being careless when they held me. He would read stories to me at bedtime.  He even gave me a special nickname that I did not always appreciate, but in retrospect it made me feel special and unique.  I felt nurtured and loved when I was with him.

Children's Artwork

Sunday, my granddaughter (17 mos) and my adult son (her uncle) were playing together.  She started to get over-excited and was losing her ability to manage her feelings and her body so he reverted to one of his favorite things to do when he needed to calm down and that was to sit with her and draw.  He taped her paper to the table to make the activity stress free for her and then sat with her and drew as she made her own beautiful picture (above).  They sat for about 5 minutes before she was done with the activity.  We got her down so she could continue playing.  She was more relaxed, calm and was better able to manage her emotions.  Art is a great way to give children the opportunity to calm their bodies and use their creative imagination; when it is child initiated and they are given the opportunity to choose the medium, explore methods of application, and to determine when they are finished.  In my example above we set the stage for my granddaughter by taping the paper to the table, gave her choices about whether to use crayons, colored pencils, or regular pencils; let her explore the tools (tasting, holding, tapping, etc.) and allowed her to decide when she was finished (through reading her body signals, facial expressions, and use of tools).  My son also enjoyed the experience (his picture is to the right) and he was more calm and relaxed when they resumed playing together as well.

Quote about Early Childhood

The following is a quote taken from "Powerful Interactions:How to Connect With Children to Extend Their Learning" (Dombro, A., p. vii, 2011).  They quoted the National Scientific Council on the Developing Child.

"Young children experience their world as an environment of relationships, and these relationships affect virtually all aspects of their development--intellectual, social, emotional, physical , behavioral, and moral. " (National Scientific Council, p. 5, 2004)

References:

National Scientific Council on the Developing Child.   2004. Young Children Develop in an Environment of Relationships: Working Paper No. 1. Center on the Developing Child, Harvard University.  Retrieved from www.developingchild.net.

Dumbro, A. et al. 2011.  Powerful Interactions: How to Connect With Children to Extend Their Learning.  NAEYC.

Favorite Childrens Book

On Monday When it Rained by Cherryl Kachenmeister 

This is a great little book with awesome photographs of a young boy expressing his emotions by changing his facial expressions.  It is a great discussion starter when teaching preschoolers how to express their own emotions and also how to detect another's emotions by reading facial expressions.

In the Fiddle is a Song by Durga Bernhard

This book is one I use when training adults to remind them that even their most challenging children have hidden potential, it is just waiting to be tapped.  It's also a good book to use with older preschoolers and K-1 kids to get them thinking about their own hidden potential and how they might be able to develop those strengths.

Modeling is Powerful

The following is a story from when I was operating my family child care program.

My father passed away and in the course of grieving, I coped by having a picture of my father on the side of my refrigerator.  One day one of my kids asked me what I was doing with the picture.   I explained that when I felt sad or lonely and was missing my father, I would take the picture out and look at it to feel better.  Over the course of the next several months, I would talk to the kids about my dad and refer to his picture.  One day when I was feeling sad, one of the kids suggested that maybe I needed to look at my dad's picture so I would feel better.  Wow! I thought by modeling my own feelings, even the uncomfortable ones, and showing them a way to cope, I have now taught them a life skill.

About a year after my dad passed away, one of my kids' (4 yrs old) grandfather passed away.  On his first day back at child care after the funeral he brought a picture with him of his grandpa and asked if he could put it on the refrigerator so he could look at it when he got lonely or sad.  Again, I never expected my willingness to expose my own emotions and share them with the kids would lead to them developing the ability to cope with such a huge transition in their life.  I still get teary when I think about that little boy bringing his picture in to place on the refrigerator.

Am I Leader in My Field? If I Am, What Kind of Leader Am I?

My journey to go back to school for my Master's degree at age 52, surprised some of my family and colleagues.  I love to learn and want to learn all that I can about early childhood so I can in turn guide others to a better level of understanding through my work as a trainer and consultant.

I applied for the Iowa AEYC Leadership Fellowship which involved creating a project to demonstrate my leadership qualities and improve the quality of early childhood in some way in our state.  In return, they awarded me $4000 towards my Master's program.

So I come to question of,  if I am indeed a leader in my state, what kind of leader am I and what kind of leader do I want to be?

I ran across an article "Reconciling Leadership and Partnership Strategies to Empower Professionals and Families" by Allred and Hancock in the May 2015 issue of Young Children that speaks to this question.  It poses two types of leadership models. The traditional leadership model versus a servant leadership model. In the article Allred and Hancock compare and contrast these two models based on "who can be a leader"; "what leadership looks like"; "how is leadership maintained"; "what are the significant characteristics of a leader?(Young Children, p. 47, May 2015)

The traditional model focuses mainly on leadership that must be earned and recognized by others, whereas, the servant model focuses on how when we give up our own power to others and empower them to do something, we are leaders in a different way.  This type of leadership doesn't require anyone else but ourself to achieve it. (Young Children, May 2015)

The article was very interesting and made me think.